2012-2013 Trail Blazers Opening Night Activity: Trade Trees, The Sun Shining on a Dog’s Ass, and How CP3 turned into Damian Lillard
Happy Halloween chumps. Let’s make this quick.
I’ve got big plans for the evening that involves eating all the leftover Halloween candy we got for the trick or treaters (that is to say, “all” of the Halloween candy), drinking moderately*, and yelling at my TV as I watch my Blazers take on the Lakers and their devastating Princeton offense. Tonight’s game isn’t the purpose for this post, but just for funsies, I’ll do a one word preview of how I think the Blazers will do: “Notgood”. (Post-game notes included at the end of the post)
Se la vie. I’ll watch anyways.
But no, bozos, this is not a post about tonight’s game. It’s a spinoff of this tweet from Ben Golliver of Blazersedge.com, after the Blazers announced they were not picking up the options on young guns Luke Babbitt, Nolan Smith, and Elliot Williams:
Welp. Clearly that’s the sign of a solid young program making sound draft decisions and reloading rather than rebuilding.
But just because every player drafted between 2007 and now is close to being gone, it’s worth noting that as a whole, the NBA is a very irrational marketplace. So much so that even dumbass decisions can somehow go through convoluted bullshittery and somehow be the bestnewsever(!) for a future generation.
For example: when the Blazers acquired the #6 overall pick this past draft from the Nets, I went batshit crazy, and did the whitest of all whiteboy happy dances. With that pick the Blazers selected Damian Lillard, and I haven’t shut up about him since.
On the other end of the spectrum…in 2005, the Blazers made a brilliant maneuver when they were awarded the #3 overall pick (aka, the rights to either Chris Paul or Deron Williams). They traded it. Obvi. But check my trade tree and see what happens. (Note: red boxes signify a player that is currently on the roster.)
I always liked to joke that the Blazers traded the rights to CP3 for Martell Webster, who was later traded for Luke Babbitt. So basically…CP3 = Luke Babbitt (#math). But I was ignoring the other two parts of the trade tree, until I actually thought it through. This year the Blazers have Luke Babbitt, Joel Freeland and – thanks to a long chain of events – Damian Lillard due to that trade. (Editors note: forgot to include this tidbit – the Blazers gave up a 2013 1st rounder, that is top 12 protected. Meaning, if the Blazers overachieve and make the Playoffs, they don’t get a 1st rounder. Just a big FYI for all of ya’s.)
Now look here: I’m not saying that the 2005 trade was good or smart. It was astoundingly stupid, and it remains classified as so. It’s just weird that my 2012 whitest of whiteboy happy dances and my 2005 screamfest of “what the hell are you doing???” are distantly related.
What does this mean? Who the fuck knows. Probably that this here author spends wayyyyy too much brain power thinking about all things Blazers, past and present. But mostly, the big takeaway should be this: the sun shines on every dog’s ass once in awhile. And considering this phrase can appropriately be used to describe the past managerial decisions of my favorite sports team, I find this news to be quite satisfactory.
(More Editor’s notes: Lillard proved why I did my whiteboy happy dance when we got him. My one word preview at the beginning of the post proved to be dead wrong. I’ve never been so thrilled to be wrong in my life. This feeling may not last, but I’m enjoyingthefuckinghell out of it for now.)